1. 1. Find a 6+ pound can of nacho cheese on Google
    … calculate how many to fill a bathtub

  2. 2. Catapult ice cube across room to safely wet sink
    … miss sink, wet self with spilled hot cocoa from mug in other hand
    … invent idea of a cocoa bath
    … calculate how much cocoa to fill a bathtub

  3. 3. Catapult radish across kitchen into sink
    … invent cannonball vegetable
    … return to life lessons from 2

  4. 4. watch YouTube to try to understand anxiety in self
    … get anxious because noise is overwhelming
    … return to 4, infinite loop

  5. 5. Massive order of vegetables delivered from Costco in large clear sack
    … become Vegetable Santa, envision new national holiday

  6. 6. Manifest awareness of cognitive biases
    … search the internet to justify own behavior, forget task
    … find cats instead
    … return to 4

  7. 7. Frugally invest and save for future
    … ration spending for ice cream and avocados
    … eat all avocados
    … return to 7

  8. 8. Prepare perfect amount of hot water for cocoa mug
    … bask in tiny Olympic moment of chocolaty greatness
    … return to 2

  9. 9. Dislike cleaning
    … get rid of all non-essential things and it goes away
    … invest in robot vacuum
    … robot vacuum makes a mess

  10. 10. Imagine what death means for different things
    … imagine appliance mass murder scheme consisting of mass-unplugging
    … unable to sleep with toothbrush light on
    … existential crisis choosing between toothbrush and self

  11. 11. dinnertime
    … stop writing nonsense
    … happiness!
    … avocados
    … return to 8,2, {7|4}
    … QED life is infinite loop of avocados and youtube



Suggested Citation:
Sochat, Vanessa. "Cause and Effect." @vsoch (blog), 19 Feb 2018, https://vsoch.github.io/2018/cause-effect/ (accessed 28 Nov 24).