I think that it’s harder to tell you than to just try and show you, so here goes.

This is what it’s like inside my head… go into iTunes, goto View, then “Show Visualizer” and blast something that moves you.

So this is the simplest set-up – music blasting and visual dancing as backdrop.

This is how I do school work, including studying, writing notes, reading, math/stat problems, graphic and web design, watching movies/TV shows, (used to play WoW :P) and usually chatting on gmail at the same time… all while in the gym on a bike, treadmill, or elliptical.

So that’s why I can get so much done – I’m most comfortable, happy, used to – visual, auditory, and physical overload. I’m in a hyper-productive, multi-tasking state for the majority of the day, at least 8 hours. Other time is filled with class, transportation, running, and small social-ness. And sleep? It’s pretty much minimized, but at least I still do it – I crash into my pillow like an iron horse shoe, and wake up exactly 6.5 hours later.

It’s also why I can’t or at least don’t like to stop moving, libraries suffocate me, and I’ll never be able to work at a desk.

So no, I don’t slow down. I know that other people slow me down, and give me the desire to step out of my element. I do that occasionally… go out to dinner, to a movie night, but in terms of waking up at 6:00 in the morning and NOT wanting to immediately go for my run, wanting to lie there and enjoy. something, or wanting to close my laptop to go and just spend time somewhere else? I haven’t found anything powerful enough to give me incentive to do that.

But you know what? That’s OK, because I won’t be able to, or possibly even want to, maintain this energy forever. So when that powerful something does find me, and challenges me, it’s going to be wonderful… I just have no idea how to understand that significance in this present moment in time.

Suggested Citation:
Sochat, Vanessa. "Inside my Head." @vsoch (blog), 12 Jun 2008, https://vsoch.github.io/2008/inside-my-head/ (accessed 16 Apr 24).